I am now up to 340 pounds. Instead of losing weight in the past few months I have gained it....30 pounds.
I had my wedding reception, wore my beautiful dress....and looked horrible.
I am so deep in self hatred now. My butt no longer fits in my desk chair. I sit in my recliner on my laptop, or I use a kitchen chair at my desk.
I am a room mother at my daughters school. Yet I can't go on field trips with them because I can not walk more than a block without needing an ambulance, or stand for more than a few minutes at a time. I can no longer consider my self a great mother. I cant even take my daughter to the Fair...because I know I wont fit on the rides and she is to small to ride by herself. I am pathetic.
I have one friend left. No support. No followers or readers here. I am alone in this. I know that I can not continue on this road, but I dont know how to stop it. Weight watchers? Might be worth a try. OA? Possibly. I just dont know. I am still working on it.
I havent given up here....just trying to decide the best way to get to where I want to go.
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About Me
- Loud fat girl
- I am just a girl on a mission. I am a wife and a mother. I have adult ADD and am finally not ashamed to admit it. Oh yeah...I am fat, and I am loud.
I am now your follower. I am listening. I weigh more than you do and am wading through to get what I want, too.
ReplyDeleteHey, I'll listen too. Honest!
ReplyDeleteYou are not alone. This post is so sad and you sound so lost. I hope you're doing okay.
ReplyDeletePlease consider coming back and blogging. Just give it a try, again. The key to this whole thing is to never, ever give up.
Take care and God bless.
Also, I tried to follow you, but it wouldn't let me. Seems to be something wrong with the follow button. I'll copy your blog url and put it in my list of blogs I read. I hope to see you posting again soon. :)
ReplyDeleteI know what you're going through. After the sudden death of my wife of 37 years I knew I had to make a lifestyle change. I've lost 143 pounds in the past 20 months. If I can do it you can do it. I tell my story on my blog.
ReplyDeletehttp://danmoffett.blogspot.com/